It is finished...my never ending advent

 Well I started this in November 2010... finished it in February 2011. That's not bad considering the blood (literally- countless pricked fingers...hopefully diabetes isn't on my plate in this life), sweat and tears that went into finishing this! But it was fun- a nice stress diffuser. 

 But I must say- I'm extremely happy I did it and proud of how it turned out. A lot of love went into the making of this advent! Hopefully this will be something we get to enjoy for many LONG years ahead! 

Outfitting the living room...

My style...hmmmmmm- that's a hard one. I guess I might say it's contemporary and a bit modern. I LOVE clean lines and open space. I'm really loving this soft and romantic, yet contemporary style I've been seeing more of lately. I've been searching for months and months for things to outfit our new house...my chosen color palette is as follows...

Gray walls
white accents
light/dark purple accents
Light brown accents

So far I know that we've got to save the money and find some fantastic things to really fit our ideal design aesthetic. I'm horrible at decorating, but I've been watching Divine Design and Candice Tells All (two shows that highlight Canadian Interior Decorator Candice Olson- whom I just adore) and I'm learning some things...

1. Arizona has weak stores.
2. I can't even SLIGHTLY shop with Jovie. She is ridiculous and a total spaz. What can you expect from a 2 year old?
3. There is NO medium ground with price for what we want. It's either WAY too expensive or WAY too cheap! Argh.
4. I should just have someone do the decorating for me since I don't really have the creative eye to put things all together.

But I will be honest...I've seen some fantastic things that are really catching my eye...

This FAB SOFA (In white)

Another FAB sofa (in charcoal)

This may be my favorite sofa yet!! (In Brussels Sky Grey)

Elton Chair (Cotton Basket Weave- Taupe or white)

Birds A-Plenty

Buzz Buzz (in white)

Sides and mirrors

Window treatments (in platinum)

Maybe even add a pet

tabletop birds

Passion in purple

Triangles never looked so good

Horses are awesome

Time's up! (in silver)

This may have to hang above the formal dining table!!

Bringing the outside (light) in...

And while I'm at it...lets take a look at some options for outdoor seating...

Loving this collection (in blue)

Now I've got to figure out how I can pay for some of this stuff. Hmm...what to sell, what to sell??? :)

Photoing...January...

I belong to a club...not sure why they let me in...maybe out of pity...or because I sometimes crack jokes...I don't know....but I like to take photos...I've really enjoyed taking pictures and now there is a purpose behind the madness.  

Objective: Each month there are 4 different topics (each member writes down 4 topics- 4 are chosen at random from a bowl) to photograph. Then, print out your favorite (or a few if you can't decide) and share it with everyone at the monthly get together. 

Here were the topics for January: Hands, Muscles, Jeff Guymon, Lost & Found

Barbie "Hands" 50 mm

'Diamond' Dallas Page "Hands" 50 mm

Vroom Vroom "Muscles" 50 mm

"Jeff Guymon" 50 mm 

(I don't know Jeff at all- Blake just said he is phased off of PCs- therefore, I had to hack)

"Lost & Found" iPhone pic

 I don't claim to be good...I just like having some sort of purpose for taking photos...sometimes those are the ones that feel the most inspired.

My baby...

** This will be a graphic "mommy" post- so for those who get squeemish talking anything "mommy" related, just skip to the end. **

Life is hard. There is no better way to put it. But, life is also really good. Jovie knows how to calm my troubled heart. Tonight, when laying her down for bed, she said "night, night, Mama" and made kissing noises from under her binkie. That is sweet...she is just awesome. I am one lucky mama.

This past week has been tough, yet strangely good. On Wednesday morning I got the best news anyone who loves children could ever get- a positive pregnancy test!! By this time I was a week late, so I figured I would give it a shot and take the test. When this has happened before, I have been reluctant to get excited to take the test because it just ends up being negative. Ugh. As if just getting your period isn't bad enough! But even when I saw the positive test, I just didn't feel the same way as when I got a positive test for Jovie. I didn't feel the same. I suppose it was Heavenly Father's way of protecting me. Protecting my heart, my emotions, and my relationship with Blake.

It didn't take but a few short hours for the nausea to set in. But that's also when the cramping started. And the blood (evidently 70% of women bleed throughout their pregnancy- and is completely normal...I just never did with Jovie)...so naturally I was really alarmed. It was red...really red. And when that combines with cramping that is not good. So I did some internet searches and called my doc...most likely if I continue to bleed, then it may be a miscarriage.

So, Wednesday came and went...and the bleeding continued. Thursday was surprisingly good- I was nauseated the whole day...so I saw that as a positive sign. Friday the bleeding came back in full force- as did the nausea. By Saturday morning I could no longer stand the anticipation. I had to know. Did I still have a baby inside me? So, I took a test... negative. Well, there was my answer. Did I really want to know? No. In my heart I already knew the answer.

**We've been trying to have a baby for a year. Reality really sucks some times. I guess I already figured that I had learned patience when waiting 3 long years to get pregnant with Jovie. I suppose Heavenly Father felt I needed to be humbled. again. He's right. I do.

I've been in surprisingly good spirits this week, considering. I understand the plan of salvation. I KNOW that I will see all of my (spirit) children some day. I know this special little spirit just wasn't ready to come join our family yet. There is a reason for all things and I have faith that through our trials in life we can gain a stronger testimony of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and learn to lean on Him as well as on our friends and family when we need strength the most.